Hari tanpa beg plastik: Have you ever look at your local lake/river/drain recently?

So I was in Tesco the other day, doing the usual stuff (buying things, of course), life is pretty good until I arrived in front of the cashier, it was pretty normal at first but then, I realize that the cashier didn’t gave me any plastic bags, so I asked her “kak, where plastic bag?” which she then replied “Hari ni hari tanpa beg plastik” which I then said to myself “Oh damn, I forgot”. “Hari tanpa beg plastik”, what the hell is that? Well for those of you don’t know what it means; it is that a couple of our government’s decision-makers have lost their minds. I mean think about it, what are they trying to archive? To see our rivers freed for plastic bags? To make sure that we wouldn't cause global warming? The only thing that this “Hari tanpa beg plastik” campaign does is making people feel stupid carrying a bunch of bag-less groceries like they’d just shoplifted it.

Let me tell you one thing, If you’ve found a river (in Malaysia) that is full of plastic bags and you’re trying to blame someone for it, don’t blame it on the Plastic bag’s manufacturers, blame it on the people, why, because plastic bags didn’t throw itself into the river, we did. And if someone in the government's office wants something to be done (and by “something” I mean trying to stop people from using plastic bags), here’s an Idea, ban all plastic bags and use this instead;

Now, was that so hard? don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that this will change everything, as the matter of fact, this’ll change nothing, let me give you an example, have you ever look at your local lake/river/drain recently? how many plastic bags did you see? I’m guessing a lot, now, other than plastic bags, what else did you see? I’m guessing slippers, diapers, plastic wrappers, tires, sofas, etc etc. In short, we Malaysians throw pretty much everything into our river system, do you really think that banning or replacing plastic bags will make a difference? Hell no. If you (the government) really-really want us Malaysians to change, be harsh to the minor offenders, we need to be more like the Singaporeans, even then I don’t think much will change, we Malaysians are barbaric rather than civilized when it comes to cleanliness, and that’s the fact that we (and of course the government) need to accept. Trying to reduce the use of plastic bags is a good try, but sadly, I think this too, is a losing battle.

Malaysian Government blocks File Sharing websites

Okay, this just in, if you live in Malaysia, you can officially say goodbye to Megaupload.com, thepiratebay.org, movie2k.to, filestube.com and many more (the entire list is in the scanned documents) because the Malaysian government is trying to ban most file sharing websites.

What the hell was our government thinking? Honestly, our government needs to know what “internet” means, “internet” means we can share whatever we want to whomever we want, whenever we please. Trying to ban things on the internet is a ridiculous move. Okay;

Dear Malaysian government,

If you guys are reading this, I have a massage for you, if you guys are trying to ban some website due to some copyright infringement lawsuit whatever (or trying to ban “cetak rompak”), you guys are doing it wrong, what you guys need to do is ban the internet itself, not just some of it, you guys need to be more like North Korea and less like the rest of the world.

Seriously, what possible outcome does our government is trying to archive? All I could think of is nothing. There’s no possible way that this move will end up giving anybody, any good. The “tauke” of the “kedai cetak rompak” will certainly be pleased of course, but what else? If you (the government) think that file sharing sites is only for downloading pirated movies and software, you’re dead wrong, that’s like banning gas subsidies because some of us might take advantage of it (and some of us do take advantage of it), you win some you lose some, pros and cons, that’s normal. If our government is serious on trying to ban “cetak rompak” prone website, they also need to ban Youtube.com or better yet, Google itself because it gives us so much info on how, where, and what to download stuff illegally.

And one more thing, I’ve noticed that one of the banned website was thepiratebay.org, what? Torrent is a freaking software, not a website, banning the website won’t stop people from downloading torrents you idiot, what about isohunt.com, or mininova.com, and even if you guys have succeeded in banning all those torrent sites, all we need to do, is find a bunch of tiny little torrent files (which we can get them from anywhere), and then start downloading stuff again, no problem.

The bottom line is, it’s impossible to ban something on the internet (Bill Gates’ said so), that’s like trying to ban Paris Hilton’s sex tape from floating around the internet, it’s a losing battle, you guys won’t win, not unless you shut down TMNet and ban the internet all together.

Why I don't trust MLM (Multi Level Marketing)

If you’ve been to college or live somewhere in a fairly civilized country, I bet that you’ve encountered it before, MLM (Multi Level Marketing) or as I like to called it, the legalize pyramid scheme. Okay, where do I start, well let’s start from the beginning, how do these people find their victims, well if you’ve been brainwashed by one of them before, you might be familiar with a few of these questions; do want to be rich? How well does your current job pays you? Are you sick of 9 to 5 jobs? Would you like to earn more than ten thousand Ringgit per week and still be a student or etc etc? As we all know, those trick questions are design to make you look miserable ‘now’ because you’ve been missing some money making action, and some people will fall for this, especially students, why? well because they’ve considered them to be the dumbest among all Malaysians, the easiest sheep to trick (that’s the reason why they like to hang out in campuses).

Enough about the trick on how they manipulate us, let’s talk about what is an MLM or (Multi Level Marketing), MLM is a system designed to screw your life, money, and relationship with your friends, and on top of that, making some rich people, somewhere, richer. MLM is also the predecessor of the “Pyramid scheme”, why can’t we call them “Pyramid scheme”? Well because they have some crap they want you to sell, for example; Shampoo, Energy drink, Water filter, cosmetic crap, and pretty much every product that you can buy from your local supermarket. Those product or as they called it “breakthrough technology“ is just an alibi or pseudonym, it’s just a cheap piece of crap they’re trying to sell so that they can called themselves “Direct Selling Company” instead of “Pyramid Scheme Company” or “Skim Cepat Kaya Company”. One more thing, if you’ve developed a good product or a device that is remarkably breakthrough-ish, why would you want to market it using MLM? Food for thought. No matter how you break it down, MLM is a Pyramid scheme, the difference between them is just that MLM is legal, why is it legal? Because of the product that comes with it, think about it, Pyramid Scheme thrives on “downline”, which means the more “Downline” or people you have under you, the more money you make, let’s say I’m about to join one of this MLM companies, and let’s say I have to pay RM1000 for entrance fee, and then, they give me a couple of products to sell, let’s say that the product they give me is a “Water Purifier” also known as “Ordinary water filter”, and then let’s say they give me 5 of those “Water Purifier” and I’m able to sell them all in about 1 week, tell me, what am I left with? I am left with a system of “Uplines” and “Downlines”, exactly like a “Pyramid Scheme”, some of this MLM people never even sell any of their products, so what’s the difference? shouldn't this be illegal? I’d rather fall to a Nigerian money scam than fall for this crap.

Here’s another thing, did you realize that in most of the times, the buyer are selling the products to another buyer, in other words, in the system, a salesman buys from another salesman which then buys from yet another salesman and so on so forth, if you’re a product developer, would you want this to happen? It seems to me that no one gives a crap about your product, everyone are in it for the “Uplines” “Downlines” game. Let me tell you something about MLM, failure is part of the game, in order to succeed, a substantial amount of “loosers” are needed (usually, people who is in the bottom of the Pyramid System), because they knew that every “well” is going to run dry someday. Who’s going to benefit from all this you might ask? The top owners (people who stands on the tip of the Pyramid or better yet, people who built the Pyramid system themselves). If you’ve decided that you’re going to try your luck in this crap, just remember this;

“The higher the risk, the bigger the reward”

That is the fundamental theory of “Risk and Reward”. There’s no such thing as easy money, or in other words, there’s no such thing as “low risk, High reward system”.

"Raja Lawak"; Who do you think we are, a bunch of five year olds?

So I was watching TV the other day when I stumbled upon this “Raja Lawak” show, this is not the first time I’ve heard about this but today, I have the mood to talk about it in detail, so, Raja Lawak, what’s that? well “Raja Lawak” is the predecessor of “Akedemi Fantasia” which was a copycat of “American Idol”, it is, in simple words, a reality show that promises people “shortcuts to fame”. I personally hate reality shows, but this Raja Lawak crap is really getting in my nerves, once again I apologies to those of you who really-really like this show, no offence but think about it, Raja Lawak is a show where you watch a bunch of adults making jokes (or try to make jokes), I’m okay with jokes but please don’t give childish jokes, who do you think we are, a bunch of five year olds? Sometimes I ask myself who’s their target audience, well, it turns out, everybody. It seems to me that Malaysians love cheap and simple jokes, there’s nothing wrong with simple jokes like the famous “Mr. Bean” series, but everybody’s doing it now, can we have some variety around here? The problem with Malay comedians these days is their acting, their jokes, and their topics, its seems to me that these comedians loves slapstick jokes, retarded jokes, jokes that can make a five year old kid laugh without the need to understand a single word they say, what’s wrong with meaningful jokes, jokes that seems true or jokes that makes us think, what’s wrong with that? I’ve always like one particular comedian, his name’s Russell Peter, and the only Malaysian comedian who can come close to what Russell does is Harith Iskandar, and that’s it.

Yes I know, I can hear you’re calling me “poyo” right now because I only like western jokes (lawak Mat Salleh), let me tell you something, jokes can be translated into many languages, every language can be funny, you just have to be creative, and above all, bold. Oh yeah, there’s another thing, ‘bold’, the reason our comedians can only do stupid childish jokes is because of where we live, we live in Malaysia, the land of the fragiles, and there’re rules which you must obey and it consisted of keeping your mouth shut, no government bashing, no ruling political party bashing, and the most important, no religion bashing jokes, and that’s the sad part, because what’s a joke without a good, subtle, read between the lines bashing huh?

Going to College Doesn’t Make You Smart

I remember the first word I said after I’ve found out my SPM results, “crap”, Yeah that’s it, crap, now what?, well, my mother told me that I should go and apply for college, at that time I was pretty naïve and all I thought was that, without a college degree, I’m pretty much a hopeless prick and the only job I could’ve get would’ve been “jaga”.

So here I am, waiting for my final semester to begin, and all I could think of is, what the hell does a “Degree” has anything to do with jobs (or a diploma for that matter). I remember my father used to say, “If you have a diploma (any kind of diploma will do), you can be an inspector in the Malaysian Police Force” – my father was a policeman - . So that’s it?, diploma equals inspector, easy isn’t it, so let me get this straight, let’s say that you have a diploma in say, “accounting”, and you’ve learned all the ledgers, balance sheets, economics, etc and now, you’ve found yourself standing in the middle of “balai polis” as an inspector, and one day, your boss says, “hey, we’ve found a dead hooker in a lake, go do your thing, investigate! ”, you will soon realize that you’re not going to be able to use anything you’ve learned in college, not one bit. And the worst part is, it doesn’t matter what kind of courses you’d taken in college, it is not going to matter, unless it is CSI related (forensic), yeah, that might help.

Here's another thing, CGPA, for those of you who’s never been to college, CGPA stands for “Cumulative Grade Point Average”, in other words, it means The-Sum-Of-How-Much-Info-You-Can-Crammed-Into-Your-Head-In-One-Semester-Before-You’ll-Forget-All-About-It-The-Following-Semester. To me, CGPA doesn’t really make sense, for example, I’m currently studying for my Degree in Mechanical Engineering, and my current CGPA is 2.7 (it’ll probably get lower by the time I graduate, if I’m able to graduate at all), all I need to do after I’ve graduated is find a good cable (people on the inside) or work in a crappy engineering company for a couple of years before moving to a bigger company for the obvious reason (money). I’ve heard lots of stories about people who’ve never learned engineering (at least’s not formally) working in an oil and gas company doing engineering related stuff, Now why does such thing happened, well, first of all, if you live in Malaysia, seniority is No.1 and the rest is No.2 (that includes your SPM result, CGPA, and all the other crap that you think might help you in a job interview) , and apparently, Companies in Malaysia are too lazy to train new employees all the basic crap, so now, if you’re a top fresh engineering graduate, you can be considered the same level as someone who’s never seen a screw driver before, and that theory implies to any other courses, management, IT, Human resource, you name it, and by the time you've been considered as a “senior”, HR won’t even ask for your CGPA, they don’t even care, all they want to know is; how long have you worked in this kind of field, what important stuff have you learned in your previous experience, do you have good work ethics, and the most famous; how low can we pay you for us to drain your energy and force you to work like a dog in our company.

The idea of getting a degree or trying to archive higher CGPA has been with us since our days in primary school. That was the days before we even knew what “sex” means. Remember when we were getting brainwashed to get 5As or 8As in our PMR, yeah, I remember that day, it sucks. School only praises the left-brained students; left-brainers tend to be good at analytical things; like math, physics, chemistry, so naturally, teachers love them, and for the right-brainers, school was a pretty boring experience; the endless homework, the Am-I-Suppose-To-Understand-This-Sh*t, and etc etc. Daniel H. Pink, author of the book “A Whole New Mind: Why Right-Brainers Will Rule the Future” wrote;

“ The future belongs to a different kind of person with a different kind of mind: artists, inventors, storytellers-creative and holistic "right-brain" thinkers whose abilities mark the fault line between who gets ahead and who doesn't ”

- Daniel H. Pink

He also wrote that computers can replace the analytical ability posses by left-brained people but it is impossible for computers to replace the creative ability posses by right-brained people.

So there you go, going to college doesn’t make you smart, it’ll just makes you qualified for something that does not need qualification, like being a policeman, supply-chain manager, government servant, even primary school teacher. Degrees are like visas or passports, it is just a protocol, it is just “you must have this, before you can do that” kind of protocol. I think this protocol should only be use to enter hardcore jobs; like doctor, or pilot, but if you’ve decided to become say; an air traffic controller, you’d be better off not going to college and use your pathetic SPM results instead.

What the hell are these “Mat Negro” doing here and what the hell is wrong with you Malaysian girls?

Africa, the land of Genocide, Corruption, and famine, it’s safe to say that nothing good can come from Africa except from the recent FIFA World Cup coverage and a couple of tigers in Zoo Negara. So naturally I don’t trust Africans (Mat Negro) that much. Recently, I went to a third world country (which is not in Africa) and have a little chat with an African man; he was a South African citizen, and he introduced himself as Hussein or Hassan (I don’t really remember his name), so long story short, he is one of the thousands of really horny African men who really-really want to come to Malaysia, so, as a well informed Malaysian about the subject of what’s going on in his country when it comes to “Mat Negro”, I acted stupid, trust me, you don’t want to know the reasons he gave me for wanting to come to Malaysia, because most of them are bullsh*t (well, actually all of them are Bullsh*t), but the interesting part was “how”, so, how do you think these Negros came to our country? There are many ways for them to enter this country, the most famous is to use a student pass, but this Hussein guy wanted to enter Malaysia as a tourist guide, so he can take some of us to South Africa and introduce his country to us, really?, so naturally, I acted impressed, he said that he needed me to find a good contact person in Malaysia to give him some kind of a pass to enter Malaysia legally because he said that he has been blindly rejected by Malaysian embassy when he tried to a apply for a visa (LOL, I wonder why).

So there you go, another Mat Negro trick uncovered, you can now add that to the list of tricks used by Mat Negros in Malaysia including black money, fake made-in-Africa-goods, and of course, the famous I-have-inherited-1-million-dollar-and-I-need-you-to-keep-that-money-for-me scam, also known as the Nigerian money scam. I don’t know what happened to that Hussein guy because I just gave him my fake phone number and e-mail address.

So, what else? What could possibly happen if these Negros come to Malaysia?

Well, This, A Malaysian girl, from Sarawak, her name is Marylyne Sandra Sapat,22, and she has been persuaded by a Negro to be his lover by buying her laptop, Belanja makan, etc, in the end, she ends up in jail somewhere in China awaiting death penalty for smuggling in 0.7 Kg of heroin. As I’m writing this, I ask myself one question;

What the hell is wrong with Malaysian girls?

As you know, African men are very good conversationalists because they can cheat and persuade whomever they please, in other words, they’re very good at “Talking Cock”. Now, enter the dumb, naïve, stupid, easily influenced, weak-minded, emotionally driven Malaysian Girls (usually Malay, Sabahan and Sarawakian girls who came from the Kampungs and I did say “usually”). Haven’t you girls ever read the news, or are you just too busy playing Facebook to give a crap about what’s happening in the real world out there? And why it is always (well mostly) the Bumiputra girls who falls for this sh*t? Why not Chinese or Indian girls? Well let me tell you why, before I say this, I wanted to apologize in advance because what I’m about to say will be ugly.

WARNING: If you’re a Bumiputra girl who can’t take a little criticism, then I suggest you don’t read what I’m about to write next. I don't want to be held responsible for your emotional breakdown. I'll say it as it is.

The reason why only Bumiputra girls who falls for this sh*t is because Bumiputra girls are cheap, and I don’t mean cheap as in calling them a whore, what I mean cheap is that we (as guys) don’t need to spend a lot of money to date you, we just need to be caring enough to persuade you to do anything, and that can get and will get you into trouble, so Chinese girls are expensive then? Well, sort of, ask any Chinese guy and the answer is simple, “Money”, if you don’t have it, you can kiss her *ss goodbye. To date a Chinese girl, you must have lots of Money, a house, a car and everything else that makes living in this country pleasant, Mat Negros, don’t have any of those. Am I suggesting that Bumiputra girls should be like the Chinese? Well, no, all I’m saying is that their different attitudes towards guys, saved their *sses from getting screwed by Negros.

So lesson learned then, first, don’t trust African men and second, if you’re a girl, especially a Malay girl, DON’T BE STUPID.

Slow Motion Dance Video for Japan

This dance video was created by a music/dance group World Order which is led by former martial artist Genki sudo, it was intended to give a massage of hope to the people of Japan in this trying times.

The disaster unfolding in Japan; earthquakes, Tsunamis, and Nuclear explosion will shape a new Japan in the future. So, if you live in Japan and you found your car a couple of kilometers away from where you left it, my thoughts are with you.

私の考えはあなたとい